Lol... Half Truth / Half Lies??

Interesting... But these aren't real soooooo. Yolo? Lol smh...

Question...

You ever feel like God hates you? I do... Trying to figure out why.

A Reoccurring Inconvenient Truth

Too much time spent. Too many memories shared. Sucking the life out of the past is an immortal task. To break that which never wants to be broken. To bury its very existence.

"This" means a lot, but "that" means just a bit more. Actions scream what words attempt to hide. They are the subconscious happenings of a reality and truth we wish not to discuss or admit openly.

Regardless of its ability to choke life out of the present, the alluring comfort of the past offers a selfish sacrifice from the other. A stifled future filled with contempt...

The Irony of Politics...

FTW...

There is a point where my hurt turns to anger... That moment has come. There are so many things I want to say but I know that in this emotional state, that would be the WORST thing to do. I just want to disappear for a few days. Go somewhere far away from everyone. A part of me hates the fact that I've allowed myself to get to this point. I should've stuck to my guns and just kept to myself. I'm not vulnerable when I'm alone, I don't get emotionally attached to anything, I don't get hurt by anything or anyone. I'm just alone. Me. That's it. I sometimes HATE people. Yes.. hate. They are so selfish, so self absorbed, so inconsiderate, so arrogant, so annoying, so insensitive. I find myself in a world that I can at times, no longer relate. I feel alone most of the time and I use to be ok with that. I want that feeling back. I want to be closed off again...then, I was safe. Then, I was free to be me. But now I'm just angry. Mostly at myself for allowing this all to happen. To allow myself to be in this state of mind where I feel I have no control over anything. I'm tired of that feeling. I'm sick of people. I just want to be alone... but what am I complaining for? That's exactly what I am right now. Guess I'll enjoy it while it lasts...

Life : Fxcking with my Stability

Wow...I have totally abandoned my blog. This can't be healthy. Anyway I'm here so that's what matters I guess.

So much has happened.

That's really the best way to say it. Its funny how life can fxck with your stability. You think you've got life figured out then out of now where it slaps you across the face with a stench of reality.

.Harsh.Cold.Unapologetic.

I wonder sometimes if I'm dreaming or if life is one big PUNK'd show and God is Ashton Kutcher.

I hate to sound so jaded but for the past few years of my life, I've come to the conclusion that planning anything is pointless. Getting hyped over things you think you've set up for your life is a joke, because if it doesn't line up with God's ultimate plan it will be an utter DISASTER...

So with this new revolution, I've stopped expecting. I don't expect things to go right or wrong, I don't expect life to be smooth, I don't expect my plans to follow through, I don't expect for a prince charming to come and make things all better, I don't expect to find people who will be full of integrity, I don't expect people to do what they say they are going to do. I don't expect anything that would cause disappointment.

I'm done playing with life. I've waved the white flag a long time ago. I'm giving in to whatever it brings. Let things unfold, roll with the punches if you will.

 I just hope I'm strong enough for all these blows...

My little Cousins Singing Gospel